First time here?

Hello, and welcome to this space where I write about my journey in being a higher-drive wife. If you are a higher-drive wife yourself – welcome. You are not alone. You are not messed up. You are beautifully and wonderfully made.

I wanted a space on this blog to introduce a few posts that I think may be helpful in your journey.
So, without further ado – here they are.

Is my husband’s lower drive my fault?
Part I
Part II

Are our mismatched drives a problem? My thoughts here

What if it never changes? Our response to the worst-case

How do I talk to my husband about my drive? Having “the talk”

I am struggling due to my unmet needs, what do I do?
Keeping pure within marriage, Part I
Keeping pure within marriage, Part II

Is sex like bread or tomatoes to you? A little of the lighter side of married sex

Is masturbation okay? Thoughts on the big M

It feels so hopeless – Permission to grieve

How do I handle the hurt? What forgiveness really means

What’s my role as a higher-drive wife?
Go low (serve him)
Pursue him
Seduce him

My thoughts on the theology of sex
Part I
Part II
Part II

I hope this helps you. If you think any of the other blog posts I have written should be included here, please let me know.

Welcome to being a spicy wife.

6 thoughts on “First time here?

  1. Your site is an amazing resource that has helped me so much!!! Thank you for sharing and for your insight! God Bless You, Lyn Crawford Sarasota, Fl

  2. This is amazing! When I was looking for help on seducing my husband in a “clean” way because I am the one with the higher drive, I did not expect to find anything so perfect. Thank you for posting!

  3. I have a strong sex drive…I love sex with my partner. He is great in bed but I want more. I told him from the get go that sex is very important for me. He has a rule, no sex when his child is with us(he has joint custody and we have her 3-5 days a week) so since im a sex-every-day-girl, I compromise. But, it has gotten to, the days we don’t have her with us, he’s to tired for me. Im ready but he would say he’s too tired and not in the mood…I ask for him to meet my needs in other ways but he says im being selfish and not thinking of him. Help…what do I do?

  4. Wow, your blog is everything I need right now and I have been searching to find something like this for along time. My husband and I love each other very much and have been married for 4 years with 2 small children. I struggled to understand his lack of interest and not being ‘normal’ but your blog gives me hope that we aren ot alone. Thank you

  5. I’m so glad I found this blog. I have been searching for something like this for months. My husband and I Have been married for about a year and a half. We were both virgins on our wedding night as well. A few months in it was clear I had a higher sex drive. After our last conversation about sex ended with me sobbing on the couch, I have felt at a complete loss as to what to do. I feel like I have just made things worse and have no idea how to approach the subject anymore without leaving us both feeling hurt. I hope to find some insight and advice and to work on changing how I respond to rejection. Thanks

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